It was a DIY or perhaps a re-DIY weekend. The weather was good so there was also some outdoor-time during which I pretended that I was cleaning up the garden in preparation for winter (I wasn’t cleaning up the garden — I was basking in the sun).
A little backstory for DIY number 1: Two or more years ago (time has no meaning), a contractor advised me to put a clear waterproof sealant over my shower grout. Sheepishly (see what I did there?), I did as he suggested, mostly because it made sense at the time.
Of all the DIY projects I’ve completed around the house, the one project I hated with the fire of a thousand suns was this caulk-sealant project. My shower is large — three people and a pitbull large — and completely granite-tiled.
Yes, yes, this sounds like a flex. I know. Let me assure you that this entire master bath was built by the previous owner’s father in a last-ditch effort to make the house more attractive on the market because the previous owners had already bought another house way more expensive and were in a bit of financial distress.
So, handyman dad, as I like to call him, built a master bath in our attic bedroom. Don’t get me wrong. I love having a bathroom for my middle-of-the-night, had-three-children-and-now-I-pee-every-two-minutes bathroom trips. However, there are more things wrong than right with this bathroom. First of all, it’s too heavy for the floor so I need to have someone come in and let me know if I’m going to fall into the second floor bathroom someday.
Second, the beautiful jacuzzi tub is too big for the water heater and can only be filled halfway unless you want to sit in a full but freezing tub. And yes, the jets only work when the tub is full … AND even when they aren’t used, they have to be cleaned so mold doesn’t grow. So, yay, more cleaning.
Anyway, back to this weekend’s project: The sealant had turned out to be a fiasco. It didn’t properly adhere (probably my fault), water got underneath the sealant, black mold started to grow …. Blah, blah, blah. So, this weekend, I removed every inch of that darn sealant. The only thing worse than applying the sealant was the memory of applying the sealant while I removed the sealant.
My mom — who could build a pattern and make a suit from scratch — used to say that her punishment in hell would either be that she’d be cold for all eternity or that she would spend the rest of time pulling out stitches she had just put in. After this weekend’s shower sealant cleanse, I have to agree. And since I’ll now be regrouting all that granite tile, I’m deeply empathizing with her in a way that I never could have in my callow youth.
Regrouting will — fortunately — not involve a caulk gun, a device created by men (sorry, guys, but it’s true; it was patented by Theodore Witte in 1894) to make individuals with weak hand strength feel even more inadequate. I am planning to start the regrouting this weekend, though I am hoping for a distraction that will allow me to procrastinate for another few days. Any suggestions?
For my second DIY of the weekend, I replaced a broken toilet tank lever. This was far easier than I expected actually. I have done some light plumbing work before but I wouldn’t even refer to this as light. The only problem I ran into was that our stupid mid-80s half-bath on the first floor has gold fixtures, including a gold toilet handle. Seemingly there are no gold toilet handles in 2021, a hypothesis I can get behind, honestly.
The available toilet handle color choices were rather minimal, in my opinion — white plastic, silver plastic, stainless steel, “bronzed” stainless, or matte black. Where are the primary colors? Where is the sparkle? Where is the rainbow of options? I digress.
The good news, since our sink and toilet are black, is that designers say a black toilet is dramatic and chic. Imagine how they’ll ooh and ahh when they see the brand-new matte black toilet handle. Unfortunately, we still have the dreadful gold faucet but if we’re lucky that will break soon.
Also on the list for next week is the louvered door hinge which I am proud to say I have ignored for the entire summer. But now that the weather is cooling, I might have to open the closet door to get a coat so I’m going to have to replace the broken hinge. Darn it. I knew there was a reason — other than cold fingers, toes, and ears — I don’t like cold weather.
I got a text from my eldest this morning. He said he was having a difficult start to his day and asked how mine was going…. I decided to cheer him up by telling him that I just cut my hair without the benefit of a mirror. Apparently, that information is like a lightning strike to people, though I think it’s freeing to acknowledge that hair is much less important than the emphasis advertisers and marketers give it.
Why, you ask, did I cut my hair without a mirror? Simple, really. The scissors and razor were at hand but a mirror was not. The front looks great. I haven’t seen the back but when my daughter saw it, she said “Oh my god, Mom,” which, I’m assuming, translates to “I can’t believe how great that looks. Did you really not need a mirror?!” She also took a picture to share with her friends — more proof that she thinks it looks great, right?
As usual, we’ve been doing some cooking. Last night, I ate alone and had a spinach omelet. My only complaint is that, surprisingly, there was a little too much spinach. Usually, I under-estimate — you know how much spinach cooks up! But somehow, I managed to overbalance my spinach to egg ratio in favor of spinach.
On Friday, my daughter made meringue cookies for a really lovely strawberry-drizzled meringue, which we experienced for the first time at the Colonial Williamsburg King’s Arms. These are absolutely delicious. They were for a birthday party but I scored one of the extras and … mmm.
If you are looking for a light, impressive looking, and impressively simple treat, give this Meringue a try.
Hope you are enjoying spooky season. Don’t forget that my daughter’s story is set to digitally publish on November 10th!
Take care of yourselves and your communities ….
Much love.
